one more thing you may have not known about me is that i have a fear of flying. well, it is not so much as a fear of flying as a fear of dying and crashing.
i really think i would feel better if i was in the cockpit and flying the plane (not that the other passengers wouldn't be freaked out, but who cares about them) so perhaps it is really a loss of control that i dont like. here i am all high up in the sky with a huge chance of falling and i am trusting some pilot who may or may not have been in the captain's lounge boozing it up with the copilot or snorting lines off some flight attendant. so yeah, you get what i am saying. hopefully.
people have this notion that flying in an airplane is safer than driving blah, blah, blah. i dont care. there arent as many planes in the sky as there are cars on the road and the chance of a pilot making a mistake or equipment failing can still be huge.
i wouldn't say that i am an absolute freak over it, but before i fly i do worry about it a few days before the flight takes place and i worry about it while i am at my destination occasionally until i am finally back and safe at home. dont get me wrong though, i love to travel and if i had the opportunity to do it even more often than i already do (thereby creating more of a chance of an accident) i totally would.
ryan had a doctors appt. last week so i invited myself along to ask if there is something that i can take for our trip today so that i dont have a panic attack and freak out the people sitting near me. i have a tendency when we are taking off and landing to tense up and sometimes tear up or even cry and usually whisper to ryan that we are probably going to die. and dont even get me started about turbulence or needing to go to the restroom.
anyway, i asked dr. f and he told me that he would gladly give me something. of course i had to remind him to make sure that it isn't too strong in case i need to operate safety equipment and get myself to safety. i will get help for the others too, once i my needs have been met.
i picked up my prescription (well Ryan did), but then i worried it wouldnt be strong enough so i had a prescription of valium filled too just in case. i dont even know if i want to take any of it. you cant drink and i think it is just going to make me sleepy and groggy. i guess i will stop being such a control freak and just leave it to chance.
in the meantime, keep your fingers crossed that i safely land in vegas tonight. i am sure there will be plenty to gab about when i am back from my vacation in a few days...
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POST FLIGHT: And for the record, she did not talk about burning in a fiery ball of death, but she did squeeze my hand until it lost circulation.
ReplyDeleteHa! I feel the same anxiety about flying. I am glad you made it safe!
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